Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Pink Power Ranger

Greetings from The Mother Ship! We thought that we would stop in here for a couple of days before heading back to Chicago. But it really is a vacation here, with very little to worry about, so we're hanging until as late as Saturday.

I've more to say on the MIL topic, but she's starting to bore even me right now. So let's change themes, shall we?

Today, it's about the Pink Power Ranger, my sister, who is a police officer here in a nearby suburb. I want to give all of you a proper introduction to her. Y'know why? Because yesterday she almost helped deliver a baby.

PPR is currently on days, 6am to 6pm. And in St. Louis, summertime is nasty-hot. Imagine getting to put on a bulletproof vest, polyester uniform, boots and a hat. Ugh. But, as usual, I digress.... PPR got a call from dispatch that a woman was giving birth at home on her mother's bathroom floor, that the baby was crowning. The grandmother was frantic. PPR was closest, so off she went. As she went 95mph, she grabbed her phone and called a paramedic friend to request CliffNotes on baby delivery. PPR was the first on the scene, putting on rubber gloves as she ran up the driveway.

When she came into the house and found the women in the bathroom -- you can imagine that it was not a tidy scene -- the baby had been born moments before. The grandmother had caught the tiny girl, who was three weeks early. PPR checked to make sure that the infant was breathing, as she wasn't crying, but just quietly looking around and blinking. All was well. Dispatch was on the speakerphone, and everyone there was hanging on their seats waiting to hear what happened. The grandmother wanted to cut the cord, but PPR asked her to wait -- that the paramedics were fast on her heels.

Hey, did you know that paramedics carry a premie kit? They have blankets and even a little hat for these situations. Neat, huh?

Firefighters, who are also EMT's, arrived on the scene as well. Grandma kept busy making calls, Mom was in a bit of a stupor as she was loaded into the ambulance, and PPR got to hold the baby while people got organized.

All in a day's work.........

So that's PPR. She'll show up to deliver your baby. She'll also come over to a kid's house on her day off in a patrol car and in uniform to assure a little boy whose mother died of an anyeurism the week before that it was not his fault and that he did everything right (she was the first on-scene for that original call, too). She takes kids out of awful situations and gives them a teddy bear and puts her arm around them.

But make no mistake -- she'll Taser your ass if you need it.

Then she'll put you in pink handcuffs and take you to a holding cell too.

Finally, she earned the Top Gun award from the Police Academy. The only time anyone could remember a woman getting it. She shot a 299 out of 300. With both hands.

Poor Urban Dad -- PPR has taken us to a shooting range. The safest place to stand if you can't stand behind U-Dad? Directly in front of his target. He just can't hit it. Meanwhile, PPR's bullseye explodes in neon color over and over and over again. It's a sight.

I'm lucky to have PPR as an aunt for my kids, I think.


Tiffany said...

What a gal! She can be all soft and sweet one minute and the next go Charlie's Angles! She sounds like a great sis!

June Cleaver said...

Don't Tase me Bro!

Jenni said...

Wow! She sounds awesome! Does she really have pink handcuffs though?

Hey! How come you didn't slide on down here for a visit on your way through Kansas? I'm probably only three hours off course--one way:D

G said...

Now that sounds like a cool aunt! Are the pink handcuffs fluffy too, or more sparkly?

Urban Mom said...

The pink handcuffs are real. I took a picture of them once and will post them when I get home to my own computer. She's mentioned getting a variety of colors now. Guess she'll be easy to shop for at Christmas.....

Laney said...

Wow! That's awesome!

What a funny post. PPR, indeed!LOL

Amy said...

Hey Valerie,

There is a post by you on TWTM boards that doesn't sound like you. And it is asking how to start a blog. It confused me, and I'm wondering if something fishy is going on with your account.


Amy said...

Nevermind. I just clued in that someone else is using "Urban Mom" as a handle on TWTM. I saw that and automatically thought it was you. Then I realized that you have a different handle. So nevermind!

Life With My 3 Boybarians said...

Dang. I want PPR to be my Auntie.

My sil works as a homicide det in your neck of the woods. Don't. want. that. job. EVER.

But your sil rocks.

As the mom of a preemie. Soooo love those guys. I love anyone who'll show up at my door if I press 9.1.1.