Saturday, April 4, 2009

Introducing.... U-Mom's Flavor of the Month Program

After much consideration, I've opted to add a new Feature to the Urban Mom corner of cyberspace. At least, for as long as my .... ooooo, look! a shiny object ..... attention span feels the need for it.

May I present to you Flavor of the Month?

You see, I was feeling all conflicted about the whole Edward thing. I mean, don't get me wrong, he is some fine eye candy and all. But you see, I'm old enough to be his, well, really cool favorite Aunt. But I'm not dead. (there's a dumb joke in there somewhere with the whole vampire thing, but let's just leave it, shall we??) And so, I began to consider the need for some "old" blood on this site. As in, it is now time for me to play with kids my own age.

So here's The Main Rule of Flavor of the Month -- he must be no more than two years younger than me. That's reasonable, right? Keeps me within the societal confines of being good, decent and proper?

By way of a backhanded introduction, I am re-introducing my TV Boyfriend. I've referred to him before here, as well as Urban Dad's wonderful generosity in allowing me my TV dalliance. But you see, I've had a change of heart. And so, I give to you my Long Goodbye To and Break-Up From my TV Boyfriend by allowing him to be the first to wear the mantle of Urban Mom's Flavor of the Month. And no, it is not lost on me that he will be shorted by missing the first few days of April. It's not like he's going to complain, right? Besides, that's the beauty of a TV Boyfriend -- it really is all about me!

I used to be able to ignore a lot about Now-Ex-TV Boyfriend. I mean, just look at him! Couldn't you overlook a few things? So I let slide the fact that this British spy show seemed incapable of portraying one single American as competent or decent. And I could even shrug off the obvious political slant of the show that was the polar opposite of my own. After all, it's a British show, so why not give them some slack? I didn't figure that a St. Louis-raised American in Chicago watching two years later while stretched out on her living room floor was their writers' target audience.

And besides, look at him!
But after getting Netflix and getting all excited to catch back up with my TV Beloved, there were things that I just couldn't let go of anymore. No longer was the political aspect a "slant;" it was a clobbering over the head. And the anti-Americanism has become impossible to ignore. And as an All-American woman watching a TV show that is supposed to be about An Impossibly Good Guy Despite His Flaws, I want to see someone who sucks it up and strides on. As in, heroically. Because if I wanted some normal guy who would probably justifiably be having a breakdown in the middle of a nail-bitingly tense situation, I would go watch Oprah or Grey's Anatomy or some crap like that. But it's at the end of a regular day in my (happily) run-of-the-mill life. I want the Sexy Action Man for an hour of entertainment. Sadly, Ex-TV Boyfriend has become wimpy and preachy. He is no longer the man that I once "knew." And so, I'm gone!

While there are six seasons of this show available, I find myself unable to go the distance. At the end of Season 5, I finally said, "ohmygawd, are you kidding me? do you people just think i'm stupid now?"

{If you want to learn more about this Pretty-Intriguing-Through-Season-Four-Show, here's the website. And it's coming to PBS soon (in America, the show is called MI-5) and will begin with Season One, before Ex-TV Boyfriend makes his delicious appearance in the cast.}
It's been fun, Ex-TV Boyfriend. But you see, I do not enjoy being insulted, especially in my own home. You no longer serve your purpose! And so, you have been fired.

Stay tuned for next month's Flavor of the Month to meet my new TV Boyfriend! (Perhaps I will have introduced Urban Dad to him by then.......)


Perpetratin' like I'm homemakin'... said...

You know, I hate to admit this on the Internets, but...I dropped MI5 after Season Three.

When Matthew McFadden (Macfadyen?) left.

I'd like to make some pretense about the writing falling short, or their plotlines losing luster, but...yeah, no, it was just him.

Jenni said...

I have a confession to make. I've read the entire Twilight series, including the partial draft for the new book that may never be published. While I still don't see the *physical* attraction (I'm guessing werewolves are more my type physically), Edward's personality does make him pretty danged hot. Perhaps not hot enough to make me scream, "I love Edward Cullen" at the top of my lungs or wait in line for tickets, but I'm not stone and I'm not above a silent swoon. I'll stop giving you such a hard time now:o)