Breaking the News to Urban Kid 1

Two nights ago, it was beautiful in Chicago. Urban Kid 1 was comfortable running around in capris and a tank top, steadfastly refusing her mother's offers to grab her a jacket. Urban Dad finally already!! got home waaaaay late from another long day at Great Big Urban High School. We piled the U-Kids into the CR-V and headed to Evanston to Gigio's, a nothing little pizza joint that U-Dad has strangely liked for twenty-odd years.

U-Dad & U-Kid 1 began negotiating for chocolate ice cream with sprinkles, because on a beautiful night in Chicago -- especially one of the first ones that comes paired with long hours of evening light -- bedtimes becomes more of a philosophical idea than a concrete reality.

Well, for U-Kid 2, it was a concrete reality. We parked near the apartment, off-loaded the off-spring and headed towards the door. Except that U-Kid 1 had nailed down a deal of some sort for chocolate ice cream with sprinkles. (u-dad needs nary a Push before he falls right Over, in my humble opinion) So I took U-Kid 2 in for her Evening Toilette and left U-Dad with this instruction:

I'm The Bad Guy all day long. You get to tell her about R moving to Colorado this summer.

He willingly obliged, God love 'im.

Seems that they sauntered down the block -- well, he sauntered, U-Kid 1 hitched a ride on his shoulders. And as they motored down the sidewalk, he told her the news. And we learned that U-Kid 1 not only has a heart -- a sweet, giving, wonderful heart --but that it can be broken.

Her first reply was, "my first two best friends have moved away!"

(reminder: young M left for Vegas about a year and a half ago. U-K 1 still talks about her.)

So they got the ice cream at our regular spot and sat at a table outside. U-K 1 wasn't interested in staking out her own chair or initiating conversations with passers-by (puh-leeze don't let anyone tell you this Chatty Cathy homeschooled kid isn't socialized) or working U-Dad for another fun stop along the way home. She just sat in his lap and let him hold her.

Since then, she's been out of sorts. She just seems sad. I try to pull her out and ask her what's on her mind, but she practices for adolescence by saying just says, "nothing" or "I don't know." She's just not her bright-eyed, upbeat self. Occasionally, she'll ask why R is moving. I tell her that R's mom and dad made a decision to head out there. I'm trying to make it clear that this move is not any kind of comment on R or U-K 1 or their friendship. And when she asks why R's mom and dad want to go to Colorado, I'm not sure what to say. It's pretty in the mountains, and they can afford to buy an actual house with an actual yard and live on one salary so that when R's dad is furloughed from United, he can stay home with the kids for a few years because R has some sort of epilepsy and they want one parent to be home and not travelling for work? Seems a bit heavy to lay on a 5yo, huh?

Our hope is to keep her busy this summer. We'll skip town for a stretch. And then try to keep putting her in front of friends who are actually physcially here.

In the meantime, lots of hugs (she's become a touch clingy the last few days), an extra chapter or two of the bedtime book, me trying to keep my patience a little longer, etc. And tracking down R for playdates.

I'm open to suggestions for anything else, too!

Adventures in Potty Training

So we've been trying to get Urban Kid 2 trained. And "Green Eggs & Ham" has become a favorite read while having a sit-down in "the powder room." Of course, nothing happens until ten minutes after we finally wrap it up and move on with the day. But my point is this:

As I read GEH to U-Kid 2, this is the voice that I hear in my head. (u-dad suggests that this alone is reason enough to never again pick up the book) See if you can tell who it is.

(for you young'uns out there, this is from way back when snl was funny)



And as long as we're exploring the weird voices in my head as I cheerily read GEH for the twelve-hundredth time while waiting bored out of my mind patiently for a 2yo to do something on the potty, I can't help but be reminded of this old e-mail that was going around a while back:

Children's Books That Never Quite Made It:

The Boy Who Died From Eating All His Vegetables
Curious George and the High-Voltage Fence
Daddy Drinks Because You Cry
Dad's New Wife Robert
Eggs, Toilet Paper, and Your School
Fun Four-letter Words to Know and Share
The Kids' Guide to Hitchhiking
The Little Sissy Who Snitched
The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator
The Man in the Moon Is Actually Satan
Places Where Mommy and Daddy Hide Neat Things
The Pop-Up Book of Human Anatomy
Some Kittens Can Fly
Strangers Have the Best Candy
Things Rich Kids Have, But You Never Will
Whining, Kicking, and Crying to Get Your Way
Why Can't Mr. Fork and Ms. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?
You Were an Accident
Your Nightmares Are Real
You're Different, and That's Bad

This is why it's good that kids can't hear their parents' thoughts, huh?

And yeah, it's gonna be good for everyone if U-Kid 2 gets the hang of the process pretty soon.....

Oh my, it IS quiet around here...

Almost too quiet.

Almost. (wink wink)

Urban Kid 1 is continuing her "vacation" in St. Louis with Best Namma Ever!. Yesterday, she called from "Shake n Steak," where they were dining with some friends. This is a nice bonus for her, as we have to go out to the suburbs here to find one (which means that it doesn't happen, I'm afraid). BNE! also bought her a few new pieces of clothes while shopping a sale. They also hit a book fair, so I'm sure she cleaned up there as well. And when UK1 calls, she really wants to talk to UK2. Love that.

The quiet has allowed me to reflect a bit on my relationship with UK1. And I'm reassured that it isn't all power struggles and meltdowns. I think about how excited she is to have me watch her the last few minutes of her swim lessons, how she wants to show me things that she made at Spanish class, that when she's sick, all she wants is me. As with any relationship, perhaps a little space allows for some perspective.

I'm kind of starting to miss her................

In the meantime, Urban Dad and I were able to open a bottle of wine last night and have a romantic, late dinner. And we're both getting lots of time to play with UK2. It was less of an issue when I wanted to bail out yesterday afternoon to get a manicure and pedicure. And it will be less of an issue today when I want to bail out to go to the gym.

But it is pretty quiet around here.

Almost too quiet.

Almost. (wink wink)

A "Vacation" Of Sorts?

You see, my mom (aka: Best Namma Ever!) came to visit from our hometown of St. Louis. And she does not know that I have this humble blog. Only a teeny number of people that I know IRL know that I am trying blogging. I aim to keep it that way for a while.

BNE! came up on Wednesday and stayed the night. Then yesterday, BNE! and Urban Kid 1 flew back to St. Louis. Yes, BNE! collected UK1 for a lovely little "vacation." And not a moment too soon, I'm afraid. For some reason, UK1 and I have been butting heads... and hard. Almost no day has been complete without a massive meltdown and a long timeout. My sister has eloquently referred to these events as "pi$$ing matches." The nice thing is that she spends her timeouts pulling books off of her shelves and reading them. I'm thinking of starting her on this book:She'd likely finish it before her next birthday, at the rate she's going..............

There have been a few days when Urban Dad comes home to me wondering if homeschooling is actually the best answer. "She hates me! What can I possibly teach her?" His reply is always that she does NOT hate me and that even if we do just argue all day, she's STILL better off than in the Chicago system.

UK1 loves going to BNE!'s. Everything is novel and perfect. She is the center of attention. She gets to go to church (something we're a little too lax about, I suppose) and be the center of attention there. She gets to see my sister, a police officer, aka: Pink Power Ranger. And be the center of her attention. There's some sort of trampoline place that BNE! was checking out for her. And they go to the local Y to swim and play in a shiny new pool. She gets to watch Cinderella over and over again. Seriously, who can blame the kid?

In the meantime, Urban Kid 2 is getting lots of attention, especially from UD. He worries that he doesn't get enough time with her due to the whirling dervish that is UK1. As the weather improves bit by teeny tiny bit, he wants to take UK2 out for a walk in the stroller when he gets home. For the next few days, it will be The UD and UK2 Show. More power to 'em.

BNE! and UK1 are scheduled to fly back on Tuesday. But Pink Power Ranger is scheduled to drive up for a visit next Friday. So BNE! might just keep UK1 a few extra days, and all three may arrive together instead. I am all about the latter idea. So does this make me a bad mom? Or just an honest one? An honestly bad one? Or maybe one that is fortunate enough to come up for air now and then.

As much as I love living here, and as excited as I am about raising kids in the heart of the city, I do envy those that have family around them, handy on a day-to-day basis. I thank God every day for BNE! and how involved she has been from 300 miles away. I'd lose my mind without her.

But I'm still not telling her about this blog.
=-)

Signs of Spring, Part 2

(drip, drip, drip, dripdripdrip, drip)

Can you hear it?

(dripdrip, drip drip dripdripdrip)

That's the sound of melting snow and ice.

(trickletrickletrickle)

Melting and disappearing into the sewers.

There's even an occasional CRASH of snow falling off of a roof.

We got up this morning, gathered ourselves quickly and walked (because we could do so without fearing for our children's safety from the cold!) to a local diner for pancakes.

Then we took a leisurely stroll around the neighborhood (because we could do so without fearing for our children's safety from the cold!).

Then we came home and opened the back door to let out the "house-i-tosis." Because we could do so without fearing for our children's safety from the cold.

There were even birds chirping!

BIRDS, I TELL YOU!

Urban Dad is off working out, keeping himself all hot and handsome. Urban Kid 2 is napping. Urban Kid 1 and I are goofing off on the computer. Later, all of the Urbans will go over to the gym for Family Swim. You see, we can all walk over there, breathe the fresh air and go at a leisurely pace BECAUSE WE CAN DO SO WITHOUT FEARING FOR OUR CHILDREN'S SAFETY FROM THE COLD.

Can you tell that it's 50 glorious degrees in Chicago today?

Signs of Spring

Yeah, ok, it's only still February. But you have to look forward, right? Right???? And at about this time of year, I find myself on the lookout for signs that another winter is in the past, that the temps will start inching up, that at some point we might even -- here's the irony -- whine about the heat..... So here are the signs of Spring that I've seen so far. Feel free to chime in with your own!

1. Cubs tickets went on sale yesterday. I'm from St. Louis, so I'm trying to raise Cardinal fans in a neighborhood that requires special parking permits on Cub game days (this is in addition to the regular neighborhood parking permits. and if you have guests, you have to check the game schedule to see which permit to put on their car, etc). But Cubs tickets on sale means that Spring is coming. There will be throngs of folks clogging local traffic and delaying Urban Dad's commute home. I will decide whether or not to move the car based on if there's an afternoon game. People will soon be wearing shorts, jerseys, caps, flip-flops and blue bracelets that say "it's gonna happen."

(A tangent, if I may... such is the beauty of being a Cards fan... eventually, IT DOES HAPPEN! Haaaaahhhaaahhhhhhaaaaaaaaa!)

2. I saw sandals available for purchase in a store window.

3. Urban Kid 2 has outgrown most of her warm turtlenecks. I am having an impossible time finding more. Shorts and sandals, however, are in large supply. (maddening..... but let's try to keep the positive spin here, shall we?)

4. The second semester is well underway at Great Big Urban High School. The seniors are starting to get a bit itchy and restless.

5. Urban Dad and I actually have to enter the idea of "Spring Break" into our plans. Should we leave town? Should we stay and take care of a few things? Yes, we get to discuss Spring Break as if it is actually on the horizon!

6. It might hit a blistering 40-degrees this weekend. Yes, there's plenty more snow and cold coming in a few days. But it actually feels like a normal temperature in which people were meant to live, thrive even! Some of the ice on the sidewalks, grass and streets might trickle away, revealing god-knows-what underneath. (note: dog owners in this neighborhood can be a bit, um, lazy during a cold snap) Up side -- MUCH easier to get into and out of the car!

7. While skating to our car a few days ago, Urban Kid 1 exclaimed, "a leaf! a leaf!" Ok, it was a brown, dead thing getting tossed around by the breeze, but I like how she was thinking.

8. Maria over at Eclectically Yours (http://eclecticallyyours.typepad.com/) has posted a countdown until we change our clocks.

Ok, your turn. What signs have YOU seen?

The Great Wallet Caper

By Friday night, I was resigned to having lost my wallet. Perhaps I had dropped it, maybe someone lifted it out of the car when I ran in for the kids at the gym (a bold move, indeed, but not unheard of), who knows. I had searched and re-searched my gym bag. Looked all around outside of the building. Looked over every inch of the car. Looked underneath the cars that were now parked where we were earlier in the day. Urban Dad and I searched likely spots that 13-month-old J likes to stash things (endtables, under furniture, lower drawers). I even donned rubber gloves and checked trash cans and dumpsters around the gym, in case someone had tossed it.

Nothing. 36 hours' worth of it.

On Friday night, the four of us were playing in the kids' room. Urban Dad was lounging on the floor when he said, "Hon, what's this?" He reached under C's bed and pulled out............ a wallet!

Now let's retrace just how far little J -- this is just her SOP -- had to take this wallet once she nabbed it:

From the entryway -- the picture may be too dark, but there's a purse underneath the painting...


Through the living room and down the hall............................

Through the kitchen and around the fridge....... there's our little bandit now..........!

Into the room that she shares with her older sister........................



Where she stashed it underneath her sister's bed. Perhaps she was saving it to pour over later, like a squirrel. Perhaps she was framing her sister for trouble...................



Either way, I'm a shoe-in for Mother Of The Year for not seeing the nab, the transport or the stash.

Lesson learned.......................

Hope all of you have a Happy Monday. I'm going downtown by myself all day to take care of things that I can't get done when the kids are with me. Urban Dad has the day off teaching, so he'll be Stay-At-Home Dad for the day. I've left simple little lessons for him and C to do together. And I've ordered a grocery delivery. Idle hands do the devil's work!

If in doubt, see above story.

=-)