Luckily, We Use Citrus-Scented Cleaners

I was so efficient today. I had a moment of peace... Urban Kid 2 was parked in front of Blues Clues learning about numbers. Urban Kid 1 was down the street at a playdate. So I grabbed every bit of produce from the fridge and chopped up an amazing...and very large...salad and put it into the fridge for when my beloved Urban Dad came home.

Fast forward about an hour:

U-K 1 has been collected. U-K 2, who did not nap today so is nothing but love and sunshine, is fiddling around in the fridge while U-Dad chats with her.

Then THUDSPLAT!

Piles of beautiful salad all over the bottom of the fridge and even more piled up on the kitchen floor.

*sigh*

This is why it's good to live with a neat freak. And ooooooh man, is Urban Dad a neat freak. I'm more of a "tidy, but lived-in" kinda gal. He seems to think that Architectural Digest might happen by with a photographer.

But he's the one who cleans the kitchen floor.

You know where I'm going with this, right?

And I'm only telling you this because it's a pretty anonymous blog.

Yes, U-Dad piled the food back into the bowl. And served it up.

So when someone says to us, "he's such a neat-freak that you could eat right off of his kitchen floor!"..... Well, yeah, you could.

(PS: Best Namma Ever! is coming tomorrow for a few days. Guess what U-Dad is doing? Cleaning! So I better scoot off of the computer, lest he see me goofing off.)

;-)

(PPS: Uptown Girl: to strike out a word, go to Edit HTML tab, go to the word you want to strike out and do this: WORD Enjoy!)

Stick A Fork In Me...

I'm DONE!

As I mention over there on the left, Urban Dad & I have opted to homeschool our munchkins. We don't know for how long -- I figure "until I'm in over my head." 'Cause let's face it. We can say we're homeschooling all we want. But the fact is that I'm the one here while U-Dad is at Great Big Urban High School for upwards of twelve hours a day, where he is loved and adored by all of his students. Seriously, his homeroom kids are gone already, because they are Seniors. They came back on Friday, his birthday, to give him a cake that said, "To The Greatest Man On Earth."






Seriously, what is that like? 'Cause me? I'm the b*tch that Urban Kid 1 puts up with until U-Dad comes back.






Ok, no, it's not that bad. I exaggerate. Well, most days anyway.






But we're in a weird phase right now where every.little.freakin'.thing is an argument. Honestly, if I suggest that the sky is blue, she'll argue about it. That the left shoe should go on the left foot? Fight. That we need to be somewhere by 10am and need to get gathered? It's, "I'm not going." Five going on thirteen. (What the hell am I supposed to do at thirteen?)






It's not like I'm doing a full day of school with her. I don't figure that we're "officially" homeschooling until September, when her peers all head off to Kindergarten and it's the U-Kids and me, still in our pajamas. So we do some stuff. All that stuff listed over there? We don't do it all each and every day.






But wow, lately doing a bit of math is like asking her to present a survey of the Jacobian Conjecture (yes, that's a real thing! no, i've no idea what it is!). And it ultimately ends with her exclaiming that what this math sheet really means is that she is the most unloved 5yo ever born. And when I took this kind of "Don't Bother Trying With Me, Lady, I'll Hate It All" attitude when teaching, at least I could send them away after an hour, and I got paid at the end of the day!






Do you remember how exciting it was with the new school year? All of your new outfits and pencils and folders and the Trapper Keeper? (What would I give to get a Trapper Keeper today?)



And how by the end of the year you couldn't get out of there fast enough?

Guess where Urban Kid 1 is right now? Guess where her mom is?

The stuff that we outsource is winding down, which helps. Art has wrapped up, except for one class. U-Kid 1, bless her dramatic little heart, has opted to give her last class to her little sister so that we can see if she might like to do Art too when we return in the Fall. Spanish has ended. Now I have to stalk get in touch with U-Kid 1's BFF for playdates, but that's ok. Soccer ends this week for the Spring session. We'll pick up the Summer session, but that's cool. It's outside, and Urban Dad can take her sometimes. And believe me, he will. Piano ends in a few more weeks.

We just might make it.

Despite my whining, I love what we've opted to do here. It's working out well -- U-Kid 1 can't go to Kindergarten; she's well past K-level work! And Urban Dad is supportive and helpful and throws himself straight into the fray as soon as he hits the door. Evenings and weekends, I can almost fade into the background and re-group while he takes them for walks and cleans and feeds and gives baths and does bedtimes (it's all total p*rn for women... and it works).

But right now, I'm done. D. U. N.

(btw, tomorrow is the free day at the chicago history museum. guess where the u-kids & i are heading?)

London Calling

A postcard arrived in Urban Dad's mailbox at Great Big Urban High School yesterday with a picture very similar to this on the front:

The following was written on the back:

Hello! From London! Your favorite English student is exploring the world. I'm working in London as a tour guide. It's fun and I love it! I travel a lot in between. It's amazing meeting so many people from all over the world. I'm booking an around the world ticket in Sept. and moving to Australia! Thanks for telling us to get out there and see the world! Best advice ever!

(little drawn heart) Beata

YouDaMan, Urban Dad! YouDaMan!!

Breaking the News to Urban Kid 1

Two nights ago, it was beautiful in Chicago. Urban Kid 1 was comfortable running around in capris and a tank top, steadfastly refusing her mother's offers to grab her a jacket. Urban Dad finally already!! got home waaaaay late from another long day at Great Big Urban High School. We piled the U-Kids into the CR-V and headed to Evanston to Gigio's, a nothing little pizza joint that U-Dad has strangely liked for twenty-odd years.

U-Dad & U-Kid 1 began negotiating for chocolate ice cream with sprinkles, because on a beautiful night in Chicago -- especially one of the first ones that comes paired with long hours of evening light -- bedtimes becomes more of a philosophical idea than a concrete reality.

Well, for U-Kid 2, it was a concrete reality. We parked near the apartment, off-loaded the off-spring and headed towards the door. Except that U-Kid 1 had nailed down a deal of some sort for chocolate ice cream with sprinkles. (u-dad needs nary a Push before he falls right Over, in my humble opinion) So I took U-Kid 2 in for her Evening Toilette and left U-Dad with this instruction:

I'm The Bad Guy all day long. You get to tell her about R moving to Colorado this summer.

He willingly obliged, God love 'im.

Seems that they sauntered down the block -- well, he sauntered, U-Kid 1 hitched a ride on his shoulders. And as they motored down the sidewalk, he told her the news. And we learned that U-Kid 1 not only has a heart -- a sweet, giving, wonderful heart --but that it can be broken.

Her first reply was, "my first two best friends have moved away!"

(reminder: young M left for Vegas about a year and a half ago. U-K 1 still talks about her.)

So they got the ice cream at our regular spot and sat at a table outside. U-K 1 wasn't interested in staking out her own chair or initiating conversations with passers-by (puh-leeze don't let anyone tell you this Chatty Cathy homeschooled kid isn't socialized) or working U-Dad for another fun stop along the way home. She just sat in his lap and let him hold her.

Since then, she's been out of sorts. She just seems sad. I try to pull her out and ask her what's on her mind, but she practices for adolescence by saying just says, "nothing" or "I don't know." She's just not her bright-eyed, upbeat self. Occasionally, she'll ask why R is moving. I tell her that R's mom and dad made a decision to head out there. I'm trying to make it clear that this move is not any kind of comment on R or U-K 1 or their friendship. And when she asks why R's mom and dad want to go to Colorado, I'm not sure what to say. It's pretty in the mountains, and they can afford to buy an actual house with an actual yard and live on one salary so that when R's dad is furloughed from United, he can stay home with the kids for a few years because R has some sort of epilepsy and they want one parent to be home and not travelling for work? Seems a bit heavy to lay on a 5yo, huh?

Our hope is to keep her busy this summer. We'll skip town for a stretch. And then try to keep putting her in front of friends who are actually physcially here.

In the meantime, lots of hugs (she's become a touch clingy the last few days), an extra chapter or two of the bedtime book, me trying to keep my patience a little longer, etc. And tracking down R for playdates.

I'm open to suggestions for anything else, too!

Urban Mom Strikes Again!

I have an amazing talent. And if you & I should ever meet and hit it off IRL, it's one you should certainly know about.




I make people move. As in, far away.





Seriously, you want to connect sometime and have a drink? Great! But let me warn you that you will need to pick up moving boxes on the way home.





My most recent recipient of this talent is Urban Kid 1's little buddy "R." R's dad is a pilot for United; her mom is a pilot for UPS. I met R's mom at the playground one day as our daughters played together. She had a new baby boy in her arms, and the loneliness was radiating off of her like a painful sunburn -- they had moved here about 15 minutes after the new baby came. Since then, we've become friendly, able to chat away a workout at the gym or a few hours at the playground. U-Kid 1 loves going to R's for a playdate. She adores R and thinks that R has the coolest mom evah.





But R's dad is a pilot for United who knows that he will be furloughed (aka: downsized, right-sized, let-go, laid-off, shown the door, don't let the doorknob hitcha where The Good Lord splitcha, etc.) in September. However, he can get a free move out of United if he does it really, really soon. A $30,000 value! This led to R's mom and dad discussing various places they could live and raise the kids.





Did they settle on Chicago? No.





The outskirts of Denver.





And they've already bought a place and are looking to move soon.





So while U-Dad's brother and his two kids live near Denver, and so we may see R and her family again in the future, let's face it: we won't see them at the school playground, or the gym, or the park or anywhere else but on Facebook now and then.





About a year and a half ago, U-Kid 1's friend M moved to Las Vegas. Her very-cool mom met a very-cool man who lives in Las Vegas. So off they went to make a very-cool family. (details here)





U-Kid 1 still talks about M. And young M and her very-cool mom will visit this summer. (ohpleasegod be when we are in town and not during our annual road trip!!) But still. The day-to-day encounters continue to be missed.





Being a homeschool mom, I don't take connections like this lightly. I don't mess around with U-Kid 1's schedule so that she can have regular groups that she sees. If she hits it off with someone, I make sure to connect with that kid. For example, she has a best-buddy in Spanish class (backstory here), who also lives in the South Loop -- inconveniently located for someone between Wrigley Field & the Lake. But I plan to exchange info with her babysitter before summer comes and catch up. And hopefully the girls can be in Spanish together again come Fall.





Oh, and about me making people move.





One wonderful lady moved to Atlanta. Something about her doctor-husband getting a grand opportunity there or some blah-blah-blah.





Another went to St. Louis, via a stint in Portland, Oregon. (yeah, she's in St. Louis, so I can catch up to her now when I visit Best Namma Ever! and Pink Power Ranger, but still..... not local anymore)





Anne is heading back east.

She introduced me to an interesting fellow-mom once. But before I could even get the friendship off the ground, she was off to Utah. Something about her husband and his job. Blah-blah-blah.





Another friend went to San Diego.





Yet another went to Minneapolis.


George went back to New Jersey.





I even sent a doctor back home to Michigan!





Seriously, is it me?

'Cause I'm getting a complex here.

And the effect is rubbing off. Urban Dad found a rare jewel in the English Department at Great Big Urban High School -- a teacher who he actually likes and enjoys chatting with. Yep, she's applying to teach for a Department of Defense school in Japan and asked him to write a reference letter.

The poor Urban Kids. They don't stand a chance if this keeps up!

Oh, and I expect that U-Kid 1's Spanish Class Buddy will up and move to Melbourne or some other far-flung place. Call it Waiting for the Next Shoe To Drop.

*sigh* Throw some prayers and happy vibes this way. I'm going to need to tell U-Kid 1 about little R bailing out soon.

Cringe.

Proof That God Loves Chicago Afterall

Some days, it is good to be the U-Mom. Those who have been with me for a while know that 1.) I can't cook and 2.) I am well aware of my blessings and forever grateful for them. Especially since I have absolutely no idea what I've done to deserve any of them.

There's Urban Dad. I've gone on about him before.

There's Best Namma Ever!, who continues to be the only functioning player in The Grandma Game for the Urban Kids. And she does so beautifully.

There's living in one of the best cities on the planet. Ok, there are several times I question this. Don't ask me about having the highest sales tax in the nation. Or parking. Or taxes in general. Or the weather. Or graft. Or the schools. Or the ridiculous Olympics bid. Ask me about something else.

Like this man.

His name is Grant Achatz. God sent this artist to Earth, and saw fit to send him to Chicago.

What Shakespeare did with words, what Van Gogh did with paint, what Mozart did with music, this guy does with food.

His restaurant is called Alinea, and it is less than two miles from the humble Urban Family abode. It is also one of the Top 10 Restaurants in the World.

Now God nearly saw fit to take Grant right back, but apparently changed his mind. You see, young Grant here was diagnosed with a horrific case of tongue cancer a few years ago. He had two small kids and had just opened Alinea. Doctors were floored to see it in such a young, healthy man. They wanted to save his life by cutting out his tongue.

It's like a sick joke, right?

One doctor went with a different route. In addition to the usual poison-and-burn treatment, he added in an experimental drug. And left Grant's tongue in his head.

Read the whole incredible story here.

But the long and short of it is that Grant survived. Alinea survived. And they both seem to be doing beautifully. People from all over the country and world come to Alinea to experience the latest fascinating ideas knocking around in his unsettlingly creative mind. Honestly, you sit, look at your plate (if the food is even on one!), listen to the description, and wonder, "who thinks of that?" And then you thank your lucky stars that he did. And you wait with barely bated breath for whatever he deigns to offer next. 'Cause it's going to blow. your. mind.

Last summer, U-Dad's mom sent a generous check for his birthday. "Go blow it on a great dinner," she said. We thought of all of the things that we could do with it, but honored her request. While the U-Kids were at Grandma Camp with Best Namma Ever!, we decided to Swank Out for the night. I was charged with looking through Chicago Magazine and coming up with some ideas.

Hey, isn't Grant Achatz that guy I've read about a few times in Chicago magazine? (when i first read about him, i thought, "wow. amazing. bummer that i'll never eat there -- outta my league.")

So I made the reservation. Like many swanky places, they have a cancellation fee if you cancel within 24 hours of your reservation. Knowing that this would set him off, I neglected to mention that nugget of info to the U-Dad.

The night before the reservation, I was sick, as in, in the bathroom losing the pizza I'd had at a local pub. U-Dad asked if we should cancel at Alinea. Even in the revolting position that I was in, I was not going to let go of that reservation.

The next day I was better. And off we went. I'd never been to a place without any signage in front. Thus, the tip-off that we were somewhere different.

And all U-Dad & I seemed able to say to each other was, "Oh my GAWD, did you taste THAT?" And, of course, "who thinks of that?" Oh, and let's not forget the eventual, "what am I supposed to do tomorrow? Go back to a bowl of cereal?" (U-Dad made it very clear that yes, that was exactly what i was going to do.)

Some additional info here -- U-Dad grew up in a hotel family. His stepdad was a Veep with Hyatt when they were opening hotels all over the place. U-Dad has lived in enough places that he sounds like a military brat (e.g.: three high schools in four years). As a result of this upbringing, he's eaten in some of the best places. And as a result, he is dismissive of The Fancy Dinner. In his mind, it's rarely worth the money. He'd rather find the great neighborhood sushi joint and be a regular.

He was delighted to spend every last dollar of MIL's check at Alinea. And we did. It's been a year, and he's still raving. Captain Cranky U-Dad is fully and completely won over. I daresay that he's the quite possibly the tiniest bit in love.

Or maybe that's just me?

So why yammer on forever and post this now? Because last night, I took Best Namma Ever! for her birthday. I got to go back! There are several factors to this:

1. For all of the dinners that she did through her career at Boeing, I knew that she'd never been to something like this.

2. Her cheap-ass, all-talk-no-action Husband would never take her.

3. It's always fun to one-up Her Husband.

4. She deserves the best.

5. With all of the free childcare she gives us, we're still coming out ahead.

6. And I got to eat, too!

And I think that she's in love now, too. That's ok. I don't mind sharing this one.

So yeah, with all of the lovely restaurants that there are in Chicago, this is the one where whenever I drive by -- and I do so several times a week -- I wave and yell, "I'll see you again someday! I don't know when, but someday! I love you, Grant!"

Teachable Moments for the U-Mom

Hey there! Guess what I learned this past weekend, solo with the Urban Kids?

First, don't let them know you're afraid. They can smell fear. Now, U-Kid 2 can't smell her own pull-up and will deny deny deny that she needs a fresh one. She also can sense her mom's exasperation and will not announce a need to use the potty no matter how many hours of Dora the Explorer you promise her. But the U-Kids, however, can definitely smell fear. So it was time to put on a brave face.

Second, I learned that cooking U-Kid 1's favorite meal and lightening the hell up helped too.

Third, I learned that a beautiful day on the school playground is nothing less than a Godsend. Friends who will meet you there with their kids? Ditto.

Fourth, rainy days bite. However, taking the U-Kids to the gym and maxing out the 2-hour limit at the awesome child care facility does not.

Fifth, extra computer time and a few extra vids help too. Not caring if school gets done or not does too.

Sixth, U-Dad's absence causes my previously undiscovered bionic hearing to kick in. Seriously, it was three nights of hearing every single flippin' sound in our house, plus our landlord's upstairs, plus the house across the street, as well as the whole next block.

Seventh, the first night of a nasty head cold is just so gross.

Eighth, Best Namma Ever! and the Pink Power Ranger are excellent listeners. And BNE! probably can't get enough of me saying, "Oh my gawd, I am so sorry for everything I ever said and did after your divorce 31 years ago!"

Finally, that I'm really quite capable! You could mistake me for an actual grown-up! I strictly enforced nap/quiet time and bedtime -- afterall, enough was enough already rest is always essential. But the three of us did fine. I chugged through it all without breaking a sweat (or even a nail!). I had to keep my sh*t together because I was the only grown-up here. The real grown-up was off dealing with his own freak-show relatives.

But seriously, can we have some perspective here? As we drove away from the airport after dropping off U-Dad, U-Kid 1 let loose with the most dramatic lamentations. You see, we've never done this before. I take the U-Kids down to St. Louis to see my family once in a while, but U-Dad is always here. Well, except when all four of us pile in for the annual summer road trip. So him being the one to go was a first for U-Kid 1. So for perspective, I assured her that we were coming right back on Sunday night to pick him up. And I reminded her that her friend R has parents who are both pilots. So one or the other are often gone for a week at at a time. Sometimes they're both gone and her Grandma has to come visit. Considering their crazy schedules, this particular family spends an admirable amount of time together. She likes this family a lot, so that quickly calmed her.

I hesitated to go too far into a discussion about military parents. She & U-Dad do prayers most nights, and he always makes it a point to include our soldiers and to explain to her why we do. He's much better and the why-why-why's that accompany that talk and can do it accurately,yet without scaring the daylights out of her. But wow, I'm including the spouses left back at home much, much more emphatically now.

So yeah, we're spoiled. I'm spoiled. And totally rotten too. Right down to my squishy core. (thankyougodthankyougodthankyougod)

Oh, and we only did Happy Meals one night -- the night we collected U-Dad from Midway Airport.

(taaa daaaaaa -- hee hee)

Yes, those of you who know me know that this is indeed proud news for the U-Mom.

So no, despite my fears, this weekend did not suck. Not one bit. (U-Dad's, however, did. But that's another post.)

Ok, stop reading now and go hug someone ya love!

Flying Solo

Well, sh*t. Sh*tsh*tsh*t.

Remember that MIL stuff that I sorta referred to in my last post about Spring Break? Well, the MIL is in the hospital recovering from surgery to fix two breaks in her hip. And -- I'm not kidding here -- she has been so abusive and ugly to the hospital staff (again!) that they have drugged her so that they do not have to deal with her. Yep, she's out cold.

Tomorrow she can leave AMA (Against Medical Advice). One place in a nearby town was prepped to take her so that she could recover from her injury. But then they got her records from the hospital and are saying, "no thanks!"

She may have a few other options, but is unlikely to take them. Y'see, they don't bring around Smirnoff and Ambien at these places, so she refuses to go.

BIL #1 has been dealing with all of this for about five straight months now and is at his breaking point. He called Urban Dad today and begged him to come out and have this confrontation with MIL tomorrow. BIL #1 just needs someone to have his back. And to come up for some freakin' air.

So U-Dad booked a ticket tonight for tomorrow.

Now, first and foremost, I feel bad for U-Dad. Here he has a ticket to Swanky Resort Town, Colorado, but is really going to be abused by Satan's Handmaiden. And because he lives in reality, he embraces this description of his mother. In fact, it's kinder than many he's used!

(remember that show Everybody Loves Raymond? I'd have divorced Raymond before the first year was up. U-Dad's acknowledgement of reality and correct priorities are big fat chunks of glue that hold this family together so tightly)

But also important here is how this affects Me. Afterall, it's my blog. So it gets to be about Me.

Remember that other part of my last post about how soft and cushy my life is because of U-Dad? How I stand in awe of divorcees, widows and military wives? Eeeeeeyuh. This weekend is gonna suck.

Up side? It's going to be warm for a while this weekend, so the U-Kids can run off some energy at a playground.

Will try to blog as I can. I've been bad about posting and even worse about coming around to everyone else's cyber-fences for a chat.

In the meantime, hoping that you have a great weekend!

(now, who wants a happy meal??????? and how many d'ya suppose one can feed her kids in one weekend and still be considered a normal woman???????)

Why I'm Eternally Grateful For Urban Dad

I never, ever want to go back out there! BTW, I'm trying to get my hairdresser to start a blog. Her dating stories are hysterical!

Oh my, it IS quiet around here...

Almost too quiet.

Almost. (wink wink)

Urban Kid 1 is continuing her "vacation" in St. Louis with Best Namma Ever!. Yesterday, she called from "Shake n Steak," where they were dining with some friends. This is a nice bonus for her, as we have to go out to the suburbs here to find one (which means that it doesn't happen, I'm afraid). BNE! also bought her a few new pieces of clothes while shopping a sale. They also hit a book fair, so I'm sure she cleaned up there as well. And when UK1 calls, she really wants to talk to UK2. Love that.

The quiet has allowed me to reflect a bit on my relationship with UK1. And I'm reassured that it isn't all power struggles and meltdowns. I think about how excited she is to have me watch her the last few minutes of her swim lessons, how she wants to show me things that she made at Spanish class, that when she's sick, all she wants is me. As with any relationship, perhaps a little space allows for some perspective.

I'm kind of starting to miss her................

In the meantime, Urban Dad and I were able to open a bottle of wine last night and have a romantic, late dinner. And we're both getting lots of time to play with UK2. It was less of an issue when I wanted to bail out yesterday afternoon to get a manicure and pedicure. And it will be less of an issue today when I want to bail out to go to the gym.

But it is pretty quiet around here.

Almost too quiet.

Almost. (wink wink)

A "Vacation" Of Sorts?

You see, my mom (aka: Best Namma Ever!) came to visit from our hometown of St. Louis. And she does not know that I have this humble blog. Only a teeny number of people that I know IRL know that I am trying blogging. I aim to keep it that way for a while.

BNE! came up on Wednesday and stayed the night. Then yesterday, BNE! and Urban Kid 1 flew back to St. Louis. Yes, BNE! collected UK1 for a lovely little "vacation." And not a moment too soon, I'm afraid. For some reason, UK1 and I have been butting heads... and hard. Almost no day has been complete without a massive meltdown and a long timeout. My sister has eloquently referred to these events as "pi$$ing matches." The nice thing is that she spends her timeouts pulling books off of her shelves and reading them. I'm thinking of starting her on this book:She'd likely finish it before her next birthday, at the rate she's going..............

There have been a few days when Urban Dad comes home to me wondering if homeschooling is actually the best answer. "She hates me! What can I possibly teach her?" His reply is always that she does NOT hate me and that even if we do just argue all day, she's STILL better off than in the Chicago system.

UK1 loves going to BNE!'s. Everything is novel and perfect. She is the center of attention. She gets to go to church (something we're a little too lax about, I suppose) and be the center of attention there. She gets to see my sister, a police officer, aka: Pink Power Ranger. And be the center of her attention. There's some sort of trampoline place that BNE! was checking out for her. And they go to the local Y to swim and play in a shiny new pool. She gets to watch Cinderella over and over again. Seriously, who can blame the kid?

In the meantime, Urban Kid 2 is getting lots of attention, especially from UD. He worries that he doesn't get enough time with her due to the whirling dervish that is UK1. As the weather improves bit by teeny tiny bit, he wants to take UK2 out for a walk in the stroller when he gets home. For the next few days, it will be The UD and UK2 Show. More power to 'em.

BNE! and UK1 are scheduled to fly back on Tuesday. But Pink Power Ranger is scheduled to drive up for a visit next Friday. So BNE! might just keep UK1 a few extra days, and all three may arrive together instead. I am all about the latter idea. So does this make me a bad mom? Or just an honest one? An honestly bad one? Or maybe one that is fortunate enough to come up for air now and then.

As much as I love living here, and as excited as I am about raising kids in the heart of the city, I do envy those that have family around them, handy on a day-to-day basis. I thank God every day for BNE! and how involved she has been from 300 miles away. I'd lose my mind without her.

But I'm still not telling her about this blog.
=-)

Signs of Spring, Part 2

(drip, drip, drip, dripdripdrip, drip)

Can you hear it?

(dripdrip, drip drip dripdripdrip)

That's the sound of melting snow and ice.

(trickletrickletrickle)

Melting and disappearing into the sewers.

There's even an occasional CRASH of snow falling off of a roof.

We got up this morning, gathered ourselves quickly and walked (because we could do so without fearing for our children's safety from the cold!) to a local diner for pancakes.

Then we took a leisurely stroll around the neighborhood (because we could do so without fearing for our children's safety from the cold!).

Then we came home and opened the back door to let out the "house-i-tosis." Because we could do so without fearing for our children's safety from the cold.

There were even birds chirping!

BIRDS, I TELL YOU!

Urban Dad is off working out, keeping himself all hot and handsome. Urban Kid 2 is napping. Urban Kid 1 and I are goofing off on the computer. Later, all of the Urbans will go over to the gym for Family Swim. You see, we can all walk over there, breathe the fresh air and go at a leisurely pace BECAUSE WE CAN DO SO WITHOUT FEARING FOR OUR CHILDREN'S SAFETY FROM THE COLD.

Can you tell that it's 50 glorious degrees in Chicago today?

Signs of Spring

Yeah, ok, it's only still February. But you have to look forward, right? Right???? And at about this time of year, I find myself on the lookout for signs that another winter is in the past, that the temps will start inching up, that at some point we might even -- here's the irony -- whine about the heat..... So here are the signs of Spring that I've seen so far. Feel free to chime in with your own!

1. Cubs tickets went on sale yesterday. I'm from St. Louis, so I'm trying to raise Cardinal fans in a neighborhood that requires special parking permits on Cub game days (this is in addition to the regular neighborhood parking permits. and if you have guests, you have to check the game schedule to see which permit to put on their car, etc). But Cubs tickets on sale means that Spring is coming. There will be throngs of folks clogging local traffic and delaying Urban Dad's commute home. I will decide whether or not to move the car based on if there's an afternoon game. People will soon be wearing shorts, jerseys, caps, flip-flops and blue bracelets that say "it's gonna happen."

(A tangent, if I may... such is the beauty of being a Cards fan... eventually, IT DOES HAPPEN! Haaaaahhhaaahhhhhhaaaaaaaaa!)

2. I saw sandals available for purchase in a store window.

3. Urban Kid 2 has outgrown most of her warm turtlenecks. I am having an impossible time finding more. Shorts and sandals, however, are in large supply. (maddening..... but let's try to keep the positive spin here, shall we?)

4. The second semester is well underway at Great Big Urban High School. The seniors are starting to get a bit itchy and restless.

5. Urban Dad and I actually have to enter the idea of "Spring Break" into our plans. Should we leave town? Should we stay and take care of a few things? Yes, we get to discuss Spring Break as if it is actually on the horizon!

6. It might hit a blistering 40-degrees this weekend. Yes, there's plenty more snow and cold coming in a few days. But it actually feels like a normal temperature in which people were meant to live, thrive even! Some of the ice on the sidewalks, grass and streets might trickle away, revealing god-knows-what underneath. (note: dog owners in this neighborhood can be a bit, um, lazy during a cold snap) Up side -- MUCH easier to get into and out of the car!

7. While skating to our car a few days ago, Urban Kid 1 exclaimed, "a leaf! a leaf!" Ok, it was a brown, dead thing getting tossed around by the breeze, but I like how she was thinking.

8. Maria over at Eclectically Yours (http://eclecticallyyours.typepad.com/) has posted a countdown until we change our clocks.

Ok, your turn. What signs have YOU seen?

Going to the Chapel...

Ok, it's Valentine's Day. You already know how Urban Dad and I got together. Now for the wedding story.

It had been seven years since that Auto Show. SEVEN. But the thing is, I was the one just hanging on to how things were. I mean, was it broken? Did it need fixin'?

We had moved in together a year earlier, but I continued to hold out on getting married. I had so rarely ever seen it WORK. I knew only a tiny number of people who could say, 10 years later, "ooooo boy am I glad I did that!" Add the kids he wanted into the equation and my only thought became "no single mom thing for me, thank you."

Finally, on a Thursday in October, at 4am, he was tossing, turning, huffing, puffing. Since he wasn't sleeping, obviously I wasn't going to either. And so the conversation began.

As the conversation went on, it became apparent that this was the "now or never" moment. While he did not use these words, I knew my choices: Marry him and start a family, or let him go and let him find someone else. (If this doesn't sound like the most romantic proposal ever, don't sweat it. Keep in mind that he had been trying for about two years. I think there were three "proposals" during that time.)

Someone else? Oh hell no!

We opted to not tell anyone about our "engagement." I was subbing at Great Big Urban High, so after school, we took off for City Hall to get a marriage license. We planned to get this wedding done this weekend. He had to move now while he had the "yes!" I looked at the plastic "Marriages This Way" sign in the basement and just couldn't do it. We could do better.

On Friday, we asked a friend of ours to officate. He was a security guard at GBUH who was also an ordained Baptist minister. He sometimes teased us about doing a little something in the garden at lunch. He had to leave town for the weekend, though!

Saturday was spent trying to figure out when and where to do this.

Finally, we settled on our living room. Monday afternoon. My mom made plans to attend. Urban Dad had yet to notify anyone, although I kept suggesting his best friend and best friend's wife might like to come. Finally, late Sunday night, he called them. God love them, they cleared the time!

On Monday, Urban Dad asked our security guard/minister, who agreed. And who was also terrified -- he didn't have the right clothes, he'd never done a wedding and wanted time to look things up, etc. We offered him an internet connection and told him not to worry about the rest.

Monday after school, I went home, changed into my nicest suit. We had filled the living room with white roses and lillies. Urban Dad was having a hard time hurrying out of the building without giving anything away. I watched "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and waited.

Finally, our little crew assembled. Our Baptist minister, my Catholic guy, Methodist me and my mom, and our Jewish witnesses. And in all of this diversity, we got the job done. I was shaking so hard afterwards that I needed that glass of champagne.

My mom was so excited to not have to deal with a big wedding that she offered to take us anywhere in Chicago for dinner that we wanted. We opted for the Ritz Carlton. (the restaurant has since closed, so it was a good choice)

On Tuesday, I took the day off and ran around downtown doing the name-change, getting the new license and passport, etc.

On Wednesday, we told people at GBUHS. A teacher eloped with a sub? Word travelled like wildfire, and the behind-our-backs question was "is she pregnant?" Many people shook my hand, congratulated me, and their eyes flicked downward, then back up to my eyes.

Ahhhh, let 'em figure it out.

We haven't looked back since. Sometimes you have to get out of the wading pool, strap on the weights and jump into the deep end.

Seven weeks later, I was pregnant. Urban Kid 1 came in September.

Happy Anniversary to Us

Yep, 13 years ago today, I went on a date to the Chicago Auto Show.

Three days earlier, I had locked myself out of my apartment, having left my keys at Great Big Ad Agency's fitness center. I got home in the evening, needing a shower and dinner. No keys. Anywhere. The building super was not home. Neither was my next door neighor, Mimi.

Oh no, please don't make me go to the cute guy down the hall. I would die of embarrassment.

Ian, the cross-dressing South African across the hall, was not home. Three other neighbors who I knew were not home. Keep in mind that this was before the omnipresence of cell phones. It was 1995! And NOBODY I knew was home.

Oh no, I have to go try the cute guy down the hall.

Our apartment numbers had been removed from our doors in order to paint them. I stood in front of two doors in a strange variation of Let's Make a Deal. Which door? Which door? He said 507 when we chatted a few months ago (yes, i remembered...). Did I count correctly? Is this 507? Or this one?

Then I heard his voice on a phone call. So I knocked. He told me later that he thought a present from heaven had been dropped at his doorstep.

I tell him that if I'd knocked on the other door, I'd be married to Michael Hudson now.

He babysat me, hydrated me with glass after glass of water and chatted me up. Once the super returned, he said, "shall we continue this?" I said, "great, see you in 20 minutes, I need to shower, I'll take you for a bite to eat to say thanks." He told me later that he meant AT ANOTHER TIME. Geez, Val, smooth. Really smooth.

The next morning, there was a note under my door inviting me to the Auto Show. It's a good first date place. Crowded. Easily accessible by public transit in case you have to bail out. And if things are not going well, you can "have other plans" that you have to get to. And if they are going well, you keep hanging out.

12 hours later, I finally went home. I had little interest in marriage and none in motherhood. Who knew what had started??????